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The Broken’s Feast

10649504_10152396630845878_3341349315020260479_nDevotional Thought of the day:

Elijah was afraid and fled for his life. He went to Beersheba, a town in Judah, and he left his servant there. 4 Then he went on alone into the wilderness, traveling all day. He sat down under a solitary broom tree and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, LORD,” he said. “Take my life, for I am no better than my ancestors who have already died.”
5 Then he lay down and slept under the broom tree. But as he was sleeping, an angel touched him and told him, “Get up and eat!” 6 He looked around and there beside his head was some bread baked on hot stones and a jar of water! So he ate and drank and lay down again.  1 Kings 19:3-5

Therefore St. Bonaventure says that sinners must not keep away from Communion because they have been sinners; on the contrary, for this very reason they ought to receive it more frequently; because “the more infirm a person feels himself, the more he is in want of a physician.”

880    Don’t let your defects and imperfections nor even your more serious falls, take you away from God. A weak child, if he is wise, tries to keep near his Father.

There he was. seemingly victorious, and yet, he was devastated. He longed to die and saw no hope in continuing to live. He wasn’t suicidal, but he was so broken he couldn’t go on anymore. He was overwhelmed by sin, his own and that which he observed.

Even though I am a simple pastor, I’ve seen that frustration in lay people and pastors, as despair and frustration just tire us out so much we cannot even see the progress we have made. If I am honest, I’ve felt that way more than once.

Instinct in those times drives us toward isolation, but there is no solace there.  In fact, isolation only leaves us more time to contemplate our despair, to feel more overwhelmed, more alone, more… abandoned…not just broken, but shattered.

And Hungry…

Elijah wakes up to a meal prepared for him, a meal prepared by one sent by God to encourage him, to lift him up, to restore his vitality so he can journey a little farther down the road.  Eventually the journey, through storm and fire, through his spiritual and mental fatigue will bring him to the place where he will hear God. Where Elijah will be ready to hear God.

For me, in those moments of brokenness, my one lifeline is being cared for and fed by God.  It is as Bonaventure notes, it is in these times we need to receive it more frequently.  It is the feast set out for those who are broken and weary. Not just bread from angels, but the Body and Blood of Christ Jesus.  The feast where He gives us His own body and blood.

It is our feast.

The feast for the Broken

A time when I can realize God is restoring what is broken, where He heals that which has been ravaged by sin.  A time just like Elijah, yet shared with friends and the family of God.  A time of great peace, and healing, and rest.

As I still have moments where brokenness is profound, where I still want to run away, where I wonder if my life will ever bee less broken and make a difference, I have learned something.  To wait it out, to look forward to the next time we gather together and are provided bread from heaven.

The nourishment we need for the journey, the blessed feast for those of us broken and shattered.

This feast, whether we call it communion, the Lord’s Supper, or the Eucharist, it is the feast for the broken, the turning point where we find such grace and peace that the journey itself changes.  He will provide it, and the Spirit will draw us to it.

This is the hope we need, this is what will satisfy our hunger.

 

De Liguori, A. (1887). The Holy Eucharist. (E. Grimm, Ed.) (pp. 224–225). New York; London; Dublin; Cincinnati; St. Louis: Benziger Brothers; R. Washbourne; M. H. Gill & Son.

Escriva, Josemaria. The Way (Kindle Locations 2025-2027). Scepter Publishers. Kindle Edition.

How to Survive Burnout in Ministry. (Whether “Professional” or “Volunteer”)

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Concordia Lutheran Church – Cerritos, Ca , at dawn on Easter Sunday

Devotional Thought of the Day:
Be an example to all believers in what you say, in the way you live, in your love, your faith, and your purity. 13  Until I get there, focus on reading the Scriptures to the church, encouraging the believers, and teaching them. 14  Do not neglect the spiritual gift you received through the prophecy spoken over you when the elders of the church laid their hands on you. 15  Give your complete attention to these matters. Throw yourself into your tasks so that everyone will see your progress. 16  Keep a close watch on how you live and on your teaching. Stay true to what is right for the sake of your own salvation and the salvation of those who hear you. 1 Timothy 4:12b-16 (NLT)

207         An indispensable requirement in the apostolate is faith, which is often shown by constancy in speaking about God, even though the fruits are slow to appear. If we persevere and carry on in the firm conviction that the Lord wills it, signs of a Christian revolution will appear around you, everywhere. Some will follow the call, others will take their interior life seriously, and others—the weakest—will at least be forewarned.

It doesn’t matter whether I am a 52-year-old pastor, or a 19-year-old teaching Sunday School to a class of 25 2nd=8th graders.  There is a point when you approach burnout.

Been there, done that, and it seems taken out on a lease on an apartment at that address at times.  I’ve seen others there as well, and some crash and burn, and others persevere, not by the strength of character, or a stubborn will.  For those things cannot last through burnout.  There is something more, something internal, yet foreign.  Something, dare I say it, supernatural, that sustains them.

It’s not just a matter of personal faith, but rather, the reason that we can have faith, that we can trust, that we can depend on the Lord.

Paul tells his young apprentice to keep focused on reading scriptures, using the word of God to encourage and teach them.  As odd as this seems, it is a prescription for dealing with burnout.  For there is something empowering when we see people receive that strength. Paul urges this young man to throw himself even more into the ministry, which seems counter-intuitive.  Yet, if we focus on the work of God, we encounter Him, we find the Holy Spirit who strengthens and preserves us.

We see God is faithful, and because of His promises, we see people’s lives changed, as they are delivered from darkness into light, as we see their burdens lifted, and as we do, not only are we amazed, we find the perspective that enables us to endure.

St Josemaria speaks of the same thing as he talks of a faith that speaks with constancy about God.  Sure, it isn’t as dramatic a change as some would prefer to see, but the change is far deeper, as people will come alongside in service.  Others will grow deep in their appreciation of God’s love.  Witnessing these things assures us that our burnout is not in vain and that we can endure, for the cost is worth it.

Assured of that, the burnout loses its grip on us.  We still may be tired and weary, we may wonder if the trials will ever end, but that is not comparable to knowing this….

The Lord is with You!

AMEN!

 

Escriva, Josemaria. Furrow (Kindle Locations 1073-1077). Scepter Publishers. Kindle Edition.

The Secret of a Pastor’s Success. The “M” word.

Devotional Thought of the Day:

1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good,his mercy endures forever.
2 Let Israel say: his mercy endures forever.
3 Let the house of Aaron say, his mercy endures forever.
4 Let those who fear the LORD say,his mercy endures forever.  Ps 118:1–4 NABRE

1  Church leaders, I am writing to encourage you. I too am a leader, as well as a witness to Christ’s suffering, and I will share in his glory when it is shown to us. 2  Just as shepherds watch over their sheep, you must watch over everyone God has placed in your care. Do it willingly in order to please God, and not simply because you think you must. Let it be something you want to do, instead of something you do merely to make money. 3  Don’t be bossy to those people who are in your care, but set an example for them. 4  Then when Christ the Chief Shepherd returns, you will be given a crown that will never lose its glory.     1 Peter 5:1-4 (CEV)

And a minister who turns away from the inner source of his ministry can neither serve other people nor find fulfillment in his own life. There are many reasons why the reality that is the Church, which in the 1920s seemed to awaken so much expectation in souls, is regarded today as an alien and alienating mega-institution. But the most crucial reason is always the defection of a priest who ought to personify the institution and make her present in his own person, but who becomes instead, not a window, but a wall; who turns against his ministry instead of letting it become a trusted witness of the suffering and struggling of his own faith.  (1)  

Most pastors don’t want to admit it, but when people think of a church, or a ministry, they are the face of the ministry.  Not the physical face, but the reaction to the church itself is tied to the persona of its pastor, of the man who stands up, and has the responsibility of speaking for God.

It’s a heavy responsibility, a burden that easily tires out those who accept it.  Often, it tires them out too soon, and they determine that being a pastor is something else.  Instead of shepherding, they see themselves as communicators (preachers)  or leaders, or authors/bloggers, podcasters, who can remain at a distance, say what needs to be said, and walk away.  A couple of years ago I even heard one indicate that it wasn’t about pastoral care, because the ministry had changed, and we were no longer pastors, but ranchers.  He expected “real pastors” to leave pastoral care to lay servant ministers.

You see this in the modern drive to abandon the pastoral office to run para-church organizations, to be consultants or coaches, or to direct bureaucracies  What this does, far too often is that it distances them further from the people God called them to serve.  It becomes too easy  to become the wall that Pope Benedict describes, and their own spiritual life becomes dry and lifeless, institutionalized and alienated.

But, theoretically, safe. 

Safe from people realizing how broken we are, how desperate we are,  Safe from failing in the expectations we have, or that others place upon us. Safe from our doubts, our fears, our anxieties.  In doing so, we also become safe from the needing the faith, the dependence on God to survive.

You see, the more we are distanced from the pain our people endure, the anxiety that keeps them awake at night, the heartache that causes them to doubt God’s presence, the easier it is to become numb to our need to depend on God. When we weep and laugh, cry and rejoice with them, they see we struggle as well, that we share in this brokenness of life….

And hopefully, they see us run to the cross, to give thanks over and over for this mercy, this incredible loving kindness, this presence of God which comforts us when there is nothing left.  For that psalm to hit home, we need to know that mercy, we need to realize the power in it, the comfort, and for our people to “get it” they need to see this in us, a natural reaction. Then the psalm above wouldn’t just seem repetitive, but it would be a joy to hear, and it would undergird our meditations.

The mercy of God is the inner source of our ministry, it is the strength that sustains us when we are at our weakest, it is what enables us to have a sure and confident hope in God.  When we are in awe of His mercy, our people become in awe of it, and they depend upon it!

If only seeking and find that mercy revealed could become what we are addicted to, that which we crave more than life itself. If that was what we tweeted and posted about, even more, what we shared with our neighbors, co-workers, families and friends.

If only they saw God comfort us in our weakness, forgive us in our brokenness, if they saw us count on His mercy and grace.  How wonderful that we would know this intimacy this well, and no longer hide!  How wonderful that would be, for then, this would be real, not an academic exercise, and our souls would be the windows through which they would know God’s desire to work in their lives.

Lord, Have mercy on us!  AMEN.

(1)   Ratzinger, J. (1992). Co-Workers of the Truth: Meditations for Every Day of the Year. (I. Grassl, Ed., M. F. McCarthy & L. Krauth, Trans.) (p. 150). San Francisco: Ignatius Press.

Why is it so hard to remember this.. on Monday?

Devotional Thought of the Day:
23  “A virgin will become pregnant and have a son, and he will be called Immanuel” (which means, “God is with us”).  Matthew 1:23 (TEV)

“… And I will be with you always, to the end of the age.”   Matthew 28:20 (TEV)

159      In my wretchedness I complained to a friend of mine, saying that it seemed as if Jesus were passing me by… and leaving me on my own. But immediately I thought better of it and was sorry. Full of confidence, I said: It is not true, my Love. Quite clearly it is I who have gone away from you. Never again!  (1)

Yesterday’s church service was phenomenal.  Even overwhelming as we considered the difference between life with and without the presence of God.  To think of the difference of going from life being in ruins, to being delivered, redeemed, welcomed into the presence of God Almighty.

But today is Monday, and it started out as a Monday on steroids. I am not sure which is the dominant feeling right now, anxiety, frustration, grief, sadness.  It is Monday, which perhaps should be renamed moanday.

I so resonate with St. Josemaria’s words this morning, I feel like Christ has come, spent some incredible time with my people and me/. But then, He has moved on now, leaving us on our own, leaving us to deal with life, its problems, its brokenness, its frustrations and that which causes us to grieve.

It seems that all the rest, all the spiritual nourishment that should have lasted me well into the week, that nourishment is gone before 9 a.m.

So what is next?  How do I get my work done.  How do I focus, how do I think outside my tiny section fo the world to see who needs to be pointed to the hope Christ gives, hope that I’ve seemed to misplace, myself.

Scripture helps, the words of a consummate pastor and shepherd help, the hug of a four-year-old, who came in the church/preschool office, and offered one helps.

What I have to realize is that this is a passing moment, and my heart is deceived.  God is here; Christ is still the Lord and the one who shepherds our souls. He is here, revealing Himself, if I can but be patience, breathe, and shift my focus onto Him.

There is what I need on Monday…. to be still, to know He is God, my God, and I am one of His people.  Therefore, I can be sure of His promise… sure of His presence, and mercy.

He is here!  As the Son breaks through the moanday gloom, we find His peace… 

 

Escriva, Josemaria (2011-01-31). The Forge (Kindle Locations 754-757). Scepter Publishers. Kindle Edition.

Need Hope? No Answers? Come Experience Jesus, Have Hope! (evangelical catholic VI)

English: The Lord Jesus Christ in the image of...

English: The Lord Jesus Christ in the image of Good Shepherd. Early Christian trsdition of symbolism. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Devotional/Discussion of the Day..

 15  But have reverence for Christ in your hearts, and honor him as Lord. Be ready at all times to answer anyone who asks you to explain the hope you have in you1 Peter 3:15 (TEV)

At the same time, Evangelical Catholicism recognizes that, in offering everyone the possibility of friendship with the Lord Jesus, it is offering the postmodern world something postmodernity badly needs: an encounter with the divine mercy. As the God of the Bible came into the ancient world as One who liberates humanity from the whims and fancies of the Olympian gods or the terrors of fearsome Moloch, the Gospel of Jesus Christ and friendship with him liberate postmodern humanity from its burden of guilt, born of a tacit (if often intuitive and inarticulate) understanding of the awfulness that humanity visited upon itself throughout the twentieth century. By whom can that burden of guilt be expiated? To whom can that wickedness be confessed, and from whom can forgiveness be received? In offering friendship with Jesus Christ, Evangelical Catholicism offers postmodern humanity a path to a more humane future, absolved of the guilt of the recent past. 12 And where is this friendship with Jesus to be found? According to the evangelical Catholic proposal, this friendship is found in the Church, in the Word of God recognized as such by the Church in the Bible, in the sacraments celebrated by the Church, in the works of charity and service, and in the fellowship of those who have been “born of water and the Spirit” [John 3.5]. Despite the sinfulness of its members and their failure to live fully the meaning of friendship with the Lord Jesus, the Church is always the privileged place of encounter with the living God, who continually forms his people into the community in which the full truth about humanity is grasped.

In the last few days, I have had to deal with an increasing number of people who have struggled to have hope, to find hope.  There have been a large variety of reasons, with a multitude of causes.  Some are young with everything going right, some are more my age – and partially wonder about what is right still, still others, older and wondering if their life has any meaning, and if it ever did.  The weight they bear – each again different, seems crushing.  So crushing is the weight upon them, so much so that I struggle with just watching their struggle.   As I returned to my office, to complete my sermon, I have to write this – as much as for those around those who are struggling, as those who are.

You see – when someone is severely anxious, severely stressed, when they can’t find the answers – they don’t need to know about Jesus – they need, desperately need to know Him.

All of the sound bite apologetics sound nice, and they may even give assent to them  After all – we’ve heard them before – we’ve seen them posted on FB, they’ve made the rounds.  They may have read the books where the quotes we all love come from. and actually know the context of the quotes!

Whether they do or don’t, they need to know the God who is there with them – they need to connect to Who they feel disconnected to, or from whom they disconnected themselves.  They need a tangible and real connection to divine mercy, to the love of God that keeps them, literally guards them.  They need to know the reason we have hope – and that is far more than knowing about Christ – it is about knowing Him deep enough  sure enough, that we don’t just hope in Him the way we hope the tax bill won’t be enormous – but we expect Him, we trust Him to keep everything He has promised.   That our trust in Him, based in knowing even the beginning of the depth, height, breadth and width of His love, because we know HIm, brings comfort to our hearts.

Simple because we know – He is with us!  He is our Shepherd, our caring and providing and merciful Master.

I love how the quote from Weigel’s book identifies the source of that hope – is to be found in the Body of Christ – in the community He established, where He reveals His presence through His word, where He pours out that DIvine mercy in the sacraments of baptism and the Lord’s Supper, and yes Confession and Absolution.  (and I would include prayer – as the Apology of the Augsburg confession most assuredly tells us is sacramental)

You see, in word and sacrament ministry, we don’t just learn about Christ, we don’t just take notes on how God is promising to work, but we see HIm at work, we experience His grace, the miracle of the reconciliation that comes as God bring us to faith, as we begin to truly see what it is like to live – as we encounter His life, His mercy…

That Encounter – one which lasts all our lives, overwhelms any modern or post-modern theory.  It crushes the idea that we are alone, that there is no meaning to life – no constant to hold on to, to base our lives upon.

That is what is needed…. and that is what we bring to the picture – and what we desperately need to be reminded of, even as we do….

Lord, show us the mercy you have and have had on us!

 

(1)  Weigel, George (2013-02-05). Evangelical Catholicism (p. 59). Basic Books. Kindle Edition.

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