God wouldn’t allow “that” to happen, would He?
Devotional Thought of the Day:
The LORD is compassionate, and when you cry to him for help, he will answer you. 20 The Lord will make you go through hard times, but he himself will be there to teach you, and you will not have to search for him any more. Isaiah 30:19-20 GNT
This will all happen when the LORD bandages and heals the wounds he has given his people. Isaiah 30:26 GNT
102 Your mind is sluggish and won’t work. You struggle to coordinate your ideas in the presence of our Lord, but it’s useless: a complete fog! Don’t force yourself, and don’t worry either. Listen closely: it is the hour for your heart.
As I read the passages from Isaiah this morning, I thought I knew what I would write about, I thought I knew the route my devotions would take me. This idea of God making us go through hard times is a challenging one, even with the promise of His presence there in the background. Knowing He is ready to heal the wounds, knowing He has got us, and while we fall, it will be into His arms.
Simple, profound, difficult thoughts.
Would God really do that? Yes, He would do anything that would help us realize He is here. To get our attention, not for His sake, but because life is too challenging to go through without knowing He is there, caring, providing, yes, disciplining when necessary – but He is there.
With this thought in mind, I turned to the last bit of devotional reading, the words of St Josemaria, and my thoughts took a different direction.
You see I resonate with the sluggish mind, I too often find myself in a fog, unable to understand what I need to, never mind be ready to teach it to others. The days when my meds slow me down, or perhaps I didn’t eat right and my blood sugar is too high or low. Or maybe it is, like so often, I have many things to cope with, and it takes a while to hear which God would have me see Him work in, in that moment. (Rather than my prioritizing them!)
But added to the fog is my guilt and shame over it. Why can’t I beat it? Why can’t I be at my peak performance at all times, why do I have to grasp? Why can’t I force myself through this mental/spiritual block I have? Anxiety will set in, and I keep imagining the disappointment of God, because the things I have been entrusted with, take more time than they should, and aren’t done to my specification.
St. Josemaria tells me not to worry. Huh, what does he know! (did I actually just say that?) In fact, having read The Way a half dozen times or more, I don’t think I really read this one, really read it an thought thorugh it before.
As is proper, the Scriptures give me what I need to understand why I shouldn’t struggle and force myself, and why I shouldn’t worry and get flabbergasted. Isaiah gives me the “why”.
If there was an issue, if it was serious, then I believe God would, in His time, bring about the hard times, the wounds He would need to bandage, He would bring me running to Him. He cares about us that much, He loves us that much. He wants us aware of His presence.
There is a time for this fog, a time to be still and listen with the new heart that God has given us when He baptized us, The heart of Christ, where the Holy Spirit resides and makes Himself at home.
It is a time to be blessed, a time to be comforted, a time to be able to realize only one thing, we dwell in His presence… and that is enough. Confident that He will do what is necessary, we depend on a God who loves us, and find the rest we need.
(Realizing of course, that if we are off course, He will correct us.)
That is what faith is… being able to stop… and enjoy the fog that blocks everything until we recognize the Lord is with us!
Escriva, Josemaria. The Way (Kindle Locations 390-392). Scepter Publishers. Kindle Edition.