Hello, my name is Dt and I am a narcissist..
Devotional Thought of the Day:
1 If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care— 2 then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. 3 Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. 4 Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. Philippians 2:1-4 (MSG)
Some pressing difficulties can be remedied immediately. Others, not so quickly. But they all are solved if we are faithful: if we obey, if we observe what has been laid down. (1)
It may seem to some that my post title is said in jest, using the formula of the various x-anonymous groups.
I would have you know, it is not said in jest, I can be, and often am, as narcisstic as any person on the face of the planet, and while I am not proud of it, I must recognize it. I must confront it, cofness it, and pray to God that he would help me lay down the idol of “self”. And as with recovery programs, it is this very thing, admitting our need of God, that is our beginning step to healing.
You see narcicism is a pretty lonely life, at best, even if it is “safer” than investing ourselves in others. Fulfillment doesn’t come at the being the best we can be, if we are alone when we achienve it.
We weren’t made ot be alone, or to be he center of our own universes. We weren’t made to live on the defensive, paranoid and hardened against hurt.
We were made in the image of Christ. And we were re-created in that very image as well, created (Eph. 2:10) to be His masterpice, specifically set aside for living life as He did… sacrficially, doing good things He has planned.
It’s not easy, leaving behind our narcissism, confessing our sin, asking God to use as He designs…. It requires we see ourselves nailed to the cross, united with Christ’s death and resurrection. It requires that we live in Christ and die to self, to become living sacrifices. Yet this is what Romans is all about, and this great passage from Philippians, and Eph.5:21 and following as it deals with the relationships of husband and wife, parents and children, bosses and employees. It is what 1 JOhn is about, when it talks of us loving our neighbor, and James when it talks about faith and works. It is Christ’s life, and this life we who trust in Him are called and made right and holy to live. This is what, as St Josemaria says, is laid down.
There is a sense of irony here, for if the goal of the narcissist is self-fulfillment, self protection, to succeed at it, the narcissist has to set himself aside… drop the defenses, and invest themselves totally in others.
That is what our faith, our trust, our confidence in God enables us to do, for we find our life, alive in Christ.
Lord have mercy on us…. and help us realize that you separated us in baptism, from our narcissism.
(1) Escriva, Josemaria (2011-01-31). Furrow (Kindle Locations 1718-1719). Scepter Publishers. Kindle Edition.
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Posted on October 29, 2013, in Devotions and tagged apostolate, baptism, confession and absolution, God, living in Christ, Mental Health, narcissism, Personality, Self sacrifice, St. Josemaria Escriva. Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.
My therapist thinks my boyfriend has narcissistic personality disorder. But I agree, we are all narcissists at times. The disorder has to do with a point of view of the world in which she said the person still thinks of the whole world as extensions of themselves with themseves at the center. They never made that step as a baby or growing up of seeing others as those with a living will separate from themselves..At least, that’s what she told me. I’ve read some other point of views.It’s hard to give yourself over to caring for others and God. That is, assuming you’ve reached the point of differentiating yourself from others. Anyhow, I was going to ask you, what is an RCC church? I know your lutheran. You mentioned this to me in your last post. Ayhow, God bless!
RCC – Roman Catholic Church.
NPD is a bit stronger that just our self-centeredness. All of us struggle to think outside ourselves – but there are “apparently” people who cannot.
As I’ve been dealing with my son being on the Asperger’s spectrum, I’ve come to realize that I share many of the attributes. Yet, we can learn to adjust and adapt and realize our tendencies, and cling to Chirst – not just for forgiveness, but for being able to serve Him and others…
Sorry to hear your son is on the Asperger’s spectrum. I’ve know a few people like that, and they are some of the nicest individuals I’ve met. Your right, it seems like some people are born without the ability to think outside themselves. When I was friends with this one guy with Asperger’s, I did a lot of reading on the subject. I read of people who became more and more socially adept over time or learned to make great contributions in their field (like Temple Grandin.). Greatest blessings on you and your son.